It’s CHRISTMAS. What I enjoy most at this time of year are the PARTIES … Specifically, the ones the Agents throw.
Justin Norman (60’s) is a veteran of the agenting world. He made his fortune by snapping up all the CHAVS (is this description still acceptable in our present political correctness climate?) from various reality television programmes, turning them into multi-millionaires overnight - as well as himself !
His annual Christmas bash was held at a The Lansdowne pub in posh Primrose Hill, last night. It was a mix of TV Producers and Clients. Present were tatty-haired comedian & lothario Robbie Butler (30’s), recently back from LA, where he bagged a pop-star girlfriend and a leading role in a romantic comedy. Soap Star - Liam Lewis and his very handsome presenter son (also man of the moment) Greaves Lewis (20’s), amongst others.
It’s at such parties, deals are done and programme ideas are hatched for famous faces.
Walking into the venue, with my friend The Top Personal Assistant to A Big Telly Cheese, I notice to my horror my NEMESIS … Lizzie Saunders talking to Journalist and Daytime Star - Matthew Reese.
Lizzie (40’s) works for rival production company - Starlight Productions and is quite simply a Shark. Her dress sense is similar to that of one of those really bad Psychics, who sit at the end of Brighton Pier.
Top Agent to the Stars - Teresa O’Riley (and my good friend), made me howl with laughter, as she described their first business meeting back in the summer, ‘I wasn’t sure whether to shake her hand or just hand her my palm.’ she said at the time (God Bless Girlfriends).
As the free drink flowed, I chatted to Liam Lewis and his son Greaves, at the bar. A few minutes in I notice in the corner of my eye - Lizzie standing quietly next to us (in a bid to ear wig on our conversation I.e. programme ideas, no doubt).
Honestly, I’m never surprised at the lengths she will go to steal ideas. Fortunately, Liam is slightly DEAF, so asked if we could go and sit upstairs, as he was finding the Acapulco band too loud.
Meeting over, I decided to make my way back to the party. Emerging down the rickety staircase - I spy my friend, leaning against the wall in the hallway, chatting intimately to comedian and lothario - Robbie Butler.
I was mightily impressed by her pulling skills. Robbie was swivelling his hips in front of her. She was most definitely ‘in there’, until she pulled out her camera phone, asking to take a photo of the two of them together for her Facebook page. She explained she needed to better her current one of her with JEDWARD !!!
Robbie was left speechless. His well oiled, courting ritual clearly hadn't worked. He didn’t say a word as he turned on his heels and walked away. Honestly, I almost wet myself laughing, her timing was comedy genuius.
On seeing me at foot of the staircase, crossed-legged and crying with laugher, she grabbed her coat, demanding, ‘Let’s get out of here. I’m mortified.’
It seems the Lothario Comedian has left his sense of humour in L.A.X
It’s The X Factor Final tonight.
Shall keep you posted on shenaghans.
Love, Doris. X
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